Sisters

Madison had a wonderful time at her first slumber party. McKenzie rode with me to drop her off at the roller rink. We stayed long enough to make sure Maddie was ready to skate and then prepared to come home. And the tears began. So I will let you guess who was crying at the point of leaving Madison at her first slumber party:

A) Madison
B) Mommy
C) McKenzie

Ding Ding Ding - If you guessed McKenzie, you are right!

My sweet baby cried her eyes out, "I want Maaaaddddiiieeee." I sat in the back of the van and just let her cry. We cruised by Ellah's house for a quick dose of the bff to calm her nerves. The rest of the night went well until it was time for bed and the tears were pouring out of her eyes. McKenzie was breaking my heart! And she really got me when she fell asleep with a picture of the two of them in her arms. God bless these girls.

I picked Madison up Sunday morning about 9. She had a wonderful time and had a million stories to tell. I was so proud of her for making it all night away from home. The minute we walked in the front door, McKenzie had her in the death grip hug like she was returning from war rather than a slumber party. God bless these girls.

Later in the day, Madison asked me if they could have a picnic in the backyard. This is a new favorite activity since the playscape from Santa arrived. She was so cute bringing me the little basket we use for picnics. I made 3 sandwiches, cut up 2 apples, and threw in some chips. Off they went - the 3 amigas. I didn't hear any yelling or screaming or fighting. Only giggles. Here they are at the picnic. God bless these girls.

Slumber Party

It's happened. Madison has received her first invitation to a slumber party. I knew this day would come. Let's call this another step out of the nest. Kim and I were uncertain as to how to RSVP. I mean, these kids are only 7! I will be impressed if she makes it through the whole night, but slumber parties were a big part of my childhood and I hope she has as much fun as I did as a kid.

Plano, TX in the early 80's was a lot of fun. Granted, my parents worked too much and I turned into a latch key kid, but I had a great group of friends. As a matter of fact, most of the girls of my childhood are now the ladies of my Facebook! Julie, Margo, Melissa, Gayla, Lana & Leslie, Stephanie - we were the slumber party queens, or princesses at the time. How could I ever forget forking Phillip Panell's yard after he forked mine during a slumber party? Or watching Kujo at Lana and Leslie's birthday slumber party and having the poop scared out of me? There were games and movies and so much fun. We stayed up late, laughed a lot, occasionally froze some underwear, and always had a good time. There were scavenger hunts and pizza and prank calls to boys.

And now it is my baby's turn to take a big step out of the nest. As a mom, I know there are a million things that could go wrong. I know sexual predators are usually snappy dressers and always wear a smile. I know she may call home at midnight to come home. I know a mean little girl may tease her and hurt her feelings. I know she may feel afraid. I also know she may have the time of her life. I know she will make memories that will last into at least her 30's. I know she may walk away with a best friend like Julie, who has been as much a part of my life as my own brother.

Oh my baby is growing up and while everything in me says to hold on tight, I know I have to let her go a little at a time. I can hardly wait to hear the scoop when she comes home on Sunday morning!

Mommy

I don't remember the day I first heard Madison call my name, but I do remember how I felt when I heard her say Mommy. A warmth spread through my whole body, starting in my heart. This little tiny person had claimed me as her own. I was Mommy from that day forward. I was no longer just Buck and Nora's daughter, Carl's sister, Kim's partner, or some one's employee. I am Mommy, righter of wrongs; chief cheerleader; all time advocate; fanatic fan; and lover of everything you do.

Things came easily for Madison. She walked on her first birthday. She delivered monologues standing on the coffee table at two. Madison was coordinating play dates at three and organizing class trips at four.

Morgan, on the other hand, has not been so lucky. This sweet baby has been through many ordeals, of the medical kind, that I would have given my right arm to take her place. When Morgan was born, we thought she was deaf. She didn't pass the hearing test in the hospital nursery or at the pediatrician's office. She slept all the time and never startled. Finally, she passed the test and now we feel silly for ever worrying!

Morgan was slow to crawl and slower to walk. Physical and occupational therapy has been essential in her development and while we marval at her ability to communicate through sign language, we anxiously await her speech to develop. Morgan's first word was Jack, the dog. Eventually she said Mama for Kim. Her vocabulary is limited to just a handful of words, but the list grew longer today with the addition of my name - Mommy.

My almost 20 month old daughter with the giant smile and spirit as bright as the sun spoke my name for the first time today. I was pulling laundry out of the dryer tonight with Morgan "helping" me. And out of nowhere, she said Mommy. I knelt down beside her to make sure I heard correctly and she said it again. Mommy. I think it is the greatest word ever spoken by anyone anywhere. My heart is so full.

Morgan is going to be fine. She is going to talk when she is good and ready. Who knows, she may be fully capable of speech now but has the two most talkative older sisters. When in the world would she have a chance to say anything??

I am truly blessed to be the mother of these amazing little girls. I have no idea what I did to deserve such richness in my life and I have stopped wondering because grace has made it possible for a family to exist where there once was not. My babies have changed my life in ways I never dreamed possible and today, one more claimed me as her own.

A Fond Farewell to 2009

Wow! Where does the time go? I can hardly believe we are a few hours away from ringing in another new year. 2009 has been a rough one and I look forward to what 2010 will bring. Here are the most significant events of 2009:

* In January, we said good-bye to Kim's mother, Bern, in Chicago. Her passing came as a complete shock and rocked every one of us to the core. The temps in Chicago were well below zero when we arrived in the windy city for such a sad occassion. Bern's passing made me appreciate my own parents more than ever, and I already appreciated them a lot. I watched Kim adjust to life without a mother and prayed I would not have to do the same for a very long time. Just to be safe, I asked Mom to record her voice and put it with the will. I can't imagine not being able to hear my mother's voice given the number of times we talk during the average day. Mom thought that seemed rather depressing, but my request was granted when Mom and Dad recorded The Night Before Christmas for my children.

* Madison continued playing basketball for the YMCA. She is a gifted athlete and we are so proud of her.

* In March I went to work for Holiday Inn Express as director of sales. I was so thankful to find out I could do something more than just sell travel.

* Malia was born March 6. Kim and I went to court for the show cause hearing standard in any CPS case. We offered to do anything possible for this birth sibling of our children. We fought very hard on her behlaf and cried the whole way home when Judge Byrnes decided to keep the baby with the family. Obviously the Lord found a way for Malia to come home to us later in the year, but we were very upset at the time.

* In June Madison graduated from kindergarten!

* In July we took the family to Alaska on the R Family Vacation Cruise. It was an incredible, yet exhausting vacation. Kim and I needed 2 weeks to recover from the vacation!

* Morgan learned to walk! Praise God!

* Morgan joined the family alma mater by attending Mt. Sinai Christian Academy in August. She absolutely loves Ms. Cynthia and Ms. Letty!

* Madison started the first grade and McKenzie began her last year of pre-school.

* Malia came home in October.

* I lost my job in November.

* I began dreaming of a non-profit organization to support transracial families created through adoption. Maybe someday ...

Thank you for sharing in the life of our family.

Kung Fu Baby

Gabe, husband of Michael, leads Malia in some kung fu moves

Photo and video editing at www.OneTrueMedia.com

Video Vixens at OneTrueMedia.com

Aunt Doo Doo and Mary scored big with this Christmas present. The girls are able to see themselves on the TV as they dance to the music. Even Malia loved it!

Photo and video editing at www.OneTrueMedia.com

Musical Beds

As the mother of 4 kiddos under the age of 8, I have taken part in a game called musical beds for several years now. I am actually quite good. As a matter of fact, I can now fall asleep at any time in any place, though I prefer to be somewhat horizontal. My children are aspiring to be musical bed prodigies, for which I am so proud. Occassionally when someone has a pee pee accident in the middle of the night, I tell them to sleep on the couch after changing clothes so I can deal with the sheets in the morning.

The other night my 19 month old daughter woke up at 2 Am. She was pumped up and ready to go the distance. I thought it a good idea to pull her into bed with us in hopes she would fall asleep watching 2 other people sleeping. Ok, it seemed like a brilliant idea at the time. Anyway, she eventually falls asleep and guess what happens next? Yep, I was kicked out of my own bed. Morgan assumed the vertical/horizontal/spread eagle/diagonal position loved by all children. So out to the couch I go because I can sleep anywhere and Morgan apparently has preferences.

I immediately fall asleep on the couch. It isn't my best sleep, but I will take most anything I can get at this point in life. I wake up to sun coming through the blinds and someone poking me (hard) in the forehead. I must be sleeping hard because it takes a minute to understand what is being asked of me by the 7 year old on the other end of the finger and the 4 year old beside her.

"DID YOU PEEPEE ON YOURSELF MOMMY?"

All I could think was God I hope not, but anything is possible these days.

Christmas costs less at Wal-Mart

The on going conversation in our home for the last 6-8 weeks has been about a video game called the Nintendo DS. Madison, who has never played a video game in her life, is convinced she will die without one. The DS was the only item on her birthday wish list and her Christmas list. The problem? It costs $170!

Kim and I have polled dozens of parents and discussed the issue of the DS to the point of being exhausted. On the one hand, the DS is the ONLY thing she wants for Christmas. On the other hand, she has never been interested in video games and I believe this obsession to be completely peer pressure based. I overheard many a first grader at the classroom Christmas party say they are asking for a DS.

Who buys their kid a toy for $170? Maddie can barely keep up with her jacket at school. How is she going to keep up with a toy that costs $170? I have nightmares about the DS being left outside, at a friend's house, taken up at school, or any other countless scenarios. And then we are out $170!! And then Kim is going to kill one or both of us for giving a 7 year a toy this expensive! It has been a real dilemma. Right now, Madison is a tree climbing, trampoline jumping, play as hard as I can kind of girl. I don't want her to be an inside girl who plays with video games all the time.

Well, the entire issue worked itself out when Madison counted her birthday and Christmas money received from aunts, uncles, and other special people in her life. The kid had $150 is C-A-S-H! Wow! So yesterday Madison decided she wanted to wipe the piggy bank clean to buy her very own DS. Brilliant! Not only do we get out of making a decision, but she learns a valuable lesson about money. Now if she loses the DS, she is out the money and not us. This means only 1 of us will be crying! She has accepted a tremendous amount of responsibility in buying the DS because it cannot leave the house for any reason and it will be the first thing taken away when her ears won't work.

For example, she declared on the way to church this morning that was absolutely not going to Sunday School. Kim told her to pass over the DS. Suddenly Madison turned into Miss Sunday School American, ambassador to all children everywhere on behalf of Christian educators. Kim looks at me and says, we should have bought this a long time ago. Amen.

So back to yesterday. Madison cleans out the piggy bank and we place the funds in a zip lock bag in preparation for finding the perfect DS. Maddie feels it should be blue and waits patiently as we search for the best deal in the sales ads for after Christmas. Wanting to contribute to the search, Maddie declares confidently that Christmas costs less at Wal-Mart. We froze. And then burst into laughter. I think it is safe to say advertising works, regardless of age.

Maddie and McKenzie played at the neighbor's house while we ventured out to Wal-Mart last night. We returned home with a blue DS and left it on the kitchen counter for Maddie to discover on her own. She walked in the door and burst into cheers. She jumped up and down, hugging both of us and shouting with joy. McKenzie was swept into the excitement of the moment and began jumping and shouting too. She followed Maddie's lead and hugged each of us. Maddie stopped dead in her tracks and said, "You can't play it!" McKenzie thought for a moment and then went right back to rejoicing for Maddie's big moment. What a wonderful sister she is to Maddie.

So for anyone considering the purchase of a DS for a 7 year old, think of it as a great behavior modification tool and have your 7 year old pitch in. The lessons abound!

Merry Christmas 2009!

Another Christmas morning has passed and the house is settling down. Madison and McKenzie are in the bathtub with giant cans of shapable foaming soap. No matter what they do, I figure they'll get clean. Malia is asleep after an action packed first Christmas. And finally Morgan is in the kitchen sink, taking a luxurious bath alone with 100% of Mama's attention. This is truly a treat in our house!

For some bizarre reason, Morgan couldn't sleep last night so we have had little shut eye. I slept on the couch and the big girls woke me up at 7 Am. They were so dying to open presents! We decided to let the babies sleep and open presents quietly (not) in the living room. Here are Maddie and McKenzie anxiously dividing up the presents.



Stockings came next.






The big girls went through presents like Sherman through Atlanta!






Finally, Malia woke up.





And eventually the Princess herself.






This year the girls received so many beautiful new clothes. Here are Madison and McKenzie modeling their favorites.




The house is a mess. There is a huge pile of trash at the front door. We didn't have a big Christmas breakfast like we normally do. It was far from a perfect morning, but that's ok. We are far from perfect. I don't feel guilty and I'm not beating myself up for serving cereal on Christmas morning. It is noon and only the children are dressed. For the first time in recent memory, Kim isn't cooking Christmas dinner because we have been invited to someone else's house! We are a huge family - we are never invited to someone's house! We are very excited to spend the later half of the day with Michael, Gabe, and Nelson as take part in a traditional Mexican Christmas feast. Stay tuned for details!

Merry Christmas everyone! I hope your day is grand and your peace prevails.

Christmas 2009

Wow. It has been way too long since I last blogged. I have been so busy and blogging has been one of the last tasks on my mind, but I actually have a few moments of peace at the moment. It is Christmas Eve and the whole house is asleep. I am alone, watching The Runaway Bride and listening to my favorite owl who is braving the 20 mph hour winds. Yesterday the high was 80 and today we actually had snow flurries! Crazy!

Today hasn't been a good one. As a matter of fact, it's been pretty bad. The whole week has been nuts. On Monday, we went to court for Malia. This was a standard run of the mill hearing, to which we have been dozens of times, but we were overwhelmed by the incompetence of the birth parents. I felt emotionally drained by the time we made it home. I think it's ok to be pissed off at them. I respect them and I thank them every day in my prayers for the gifts of my children, but right now I am in total disbelief that 2 people could be so stupid.

On Tuesday, I farmed out 3 kids so Kim and I could take Morgan to Dell Children's Hospital to have tests done on her kidneys in hopes of better understanding why she gets so many UTI's. Morgan has never been an easy stick and this procedure required big guns to get the IV going. It broke our hearts to hold her down and listen to her scream. I wanted to run away screaming myself. Radioactive isotopes were injected into her veins, which later caused a fever and horrible diaper rash.

On Wednesday we met with the pediatric urologist to read the tests. Guess what? It showed NOTHING. There is absolutely nothing wrong with her kidneys so why is she getting a UTI every month just about? So frustrating! The urologist saw the diaper rash and suggested we see the pediatrician before the holiday weekend. Great! Another doctor! Morgan is terrified of anyone in a white coat and if they take her pants off, look out! The poor thing has had more catheters than anyone I know.

So today is Thursday and the day has been awful. Kim and I are both exhausted and desperately need some down time, but when you're the mothers of 4 children under 7, you don't get much down time. I laid down for a few minutes about 3 this afternoon and when I woke up, everything seemed better. The girls were absolutely gorgeous in their Christmas dresses and it felt good to be at church as a family. Here they are before the service.





The service at MCC was beautiful. We went to the Family Service at 6 and Madison walked right into the roll of an angel in the La Posadas. She amazes me. No rehearsal, no idea what she is suppose to do, and absolutely no fear.




It is always great to be with the village. They mean the absolute world to us. In the absence of our biological families, they are our family of choice.





The night has ended so much better than the day began. Madison and McKenzie are beside themselves with excitement over Santa. It took forever to get them to sleep, but alas, they are slumbering peacefully. Morgan is asleep in my bed (spread eagle no less) and I have been relegated to the couch, but I don't care. I am just so happy to be the mother of these amazing little angels. I am peaceful, finally, and looking forward to Christmas morning. The service ended tonight with Go Tell It On The Mountain. Madison, McKenzie, and Morgan were clapping and swaying to the music. My life changed forever with the birth of a baby. And it continues to change with the arrival of every angel. I am truly blessed among women and I thank God for my little ones. Merry Christmas every one!

Forest Creek Fall Festival

Last night we attended the annual Fall Festival at Madison's school. This was such a great event last year that we made plans to attend again. And the school did not disappoint! It was a beautiful night with so many things to do from bouncy houses, a petty zoo, pony rides, face painting, and so much more. All of the girls thoroughly enjoyed themselves, including the big girls!

It hasn't been a good week around our house. Not only did I lose my job on Tuesday, but we are lacking sleep with a new baby and doing our best to understand our new addition. I realized last night how peaceful I felt watching the children laugh and play and that is truly all that matters. I love my family so much. I cannot imagine my life without any one piece of our puzzle. They feed my soul and occassionally make me think I will surely lose my mind by age 40, but I love them. Dearly. Every one.

Jack the Lap Dog?

You decide.

Morgan Sits on the Potty

Well we now have 2 babies in diapers. Something has to change. We require a second cart at the grocery store to fit the boxes of diapers and they are so expensive!! Kim and I were thrilled when Morgan started showing signs of being ready to potty train. Morgan is backing up to the toilet and bringing diapers to us to change her. Naturally we are going to strike while the iron is hot. Our good friends, Tim and Tiffany, have loaned us their musical potty and we are letting Morgan "play" with it. I think we're making progress, though we're not in a real hurry, because she actually pee peed on the potty at school.

Morgan is fascinated by the muscial potty and we had so much fun watching her play with it the first night Tim brought it over. Enjoy!

Halloween 09

It is another end to another Halloween. Madison went as a rock star, complete with white go-go boots that I searched high and low for. McKenzie was super girl/wonder woman. Morgan went as a lion and Malia had a last minute costume change, changing from a zebra to a frog. We left the house about 6:30 tonight with neighbor and #1 boy friend, Sean, and his dad, Alan. We went door to door for about an hour, at which time the babies were tired and the big girls were cold. It was a great night.