Wow! What an action packed weekend we had! I am exhausted. I was so thankful to be able to take the kids to school/pre-school this morning. I needed some down time in the worst way. All 3 kids were out of school on Friday and we scheduled a play date at the bowling alley with friends.
Friday afternoon was spent at Picture People in the mall where a million fabulous photos were taken of the girls and will soon grace the walls of the store. I can hardly wait to see! Saturday started out with a bang when we held our own Easter egg hunt on the cul-du-sac. Hilary, Ruggie (new neighbor) and I hid a few dozen eggs for the kids and at 10:30 on the nose, opened the front doors of our homes to let kids spill into the street. Finding every egg took about 8 minutes so the party moved to our backyard and we had a wonderful day. I took all 3 kids to a play date Saturday afternoon and had a ball chatting with all the moms. Of course, it started to dawn on me Saturday night that maybe, just maybe, we had overdone the weekend because I could hardly move. Exhausted!
Sunday morning began with an alarm clock - ugh - and Easter baskets. I have celebrated Easter so many times in my life and it amazes me how I can discover something new after celebrating the occassion year after year.
As I drove the family to church, I thought about the gloominess of the day. The sky was dark with thick clouds and the rain began to drizzle on the windshield. The air felt heavy and I thought it probably matched the mood of the Disciples as they went about their own Sunday morning routines following the death of Christ. I once lost someone significant in my life and the darkness that surrounded me in the following days was blinding. My beloved Aunt Kathy was dead. She was only 10 years older than me and more like a sister than an aunt. A few months before she died, I read an article that said something to the effect of by the time you reach the age of 35, you will have suffered a devastating loss in your life. Reading that article I thought how blessed I was to have not lost anyone closer to me other than a grandparent.
Kathy committed suicide. There was no warning. There was no preparation of the heart. Death came to my world hard and swift. I was dazed and confused, wondering how this could have possibly happened. I kept thinking there must be a mistake. Kathy couldn't possibly be gone. As the days passed, I thought I would die not ever hearing her voice again. Driving to church yesterday, I knew exactly how the Disciples felt knowing Jesus would never say their names again. He was gone. They were alone.
And then came Sunday. Can you imagine the joy the Disciples must have felt when they learned Jesus was, in fact, alive? I know how I would have felt if the call came to my house with the news, "I was wrong! Kathy is right here! She's alive!" While I used to identify with Thomas, the Doubter, who needed to see the holes in the hands of Jesus to believe it was really Him, I now know I would have danced. No questions asked, no explainations necessary. I would have danced and cried and shouted and screamed and praised God. I would have called every person I know. I would have flown to Atlanta with the power of my own 2 arms. I would have hugged and kissed her until she begged for air. I would have held onto her with every ounce of strength in my body. What had happened before would no longer matter. The sheer joy of having back the one you love would have changed my life forever.
I am thankful beyond measure that Jesus kept His promise and rose from the dead as He said He would. I know the lives of the Disciples were changed forever from that experience because we celebrate Easter today. I know Kathy is not Jesus and she will never live again save for in my heart, but I identified with people I will never know in remembering my own loss and knowing firsthand the joy I would have felt had Kathy lived again. Easter took on new meaning to me yesterday. Like the onion, I found a new level of understanding, a new layer, to the Easter story. I pray I never forget it. And I pray for the day when I will see Kathy again.
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